Stop Blaming Eve: The Real Lesson from the Great Fall
TODAY’S FOCUS IS: Calling Men to Rise in Spiritual Leadership and Responsibility
“Then the man said, ‘The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree, and I ate.’” —Genesis 3:12 (ESV)
Let’s be honest for a moment.
How many times have you heard someone say, “Well, it was Eve who took the fruit first…”?
Too many, right?
Somehow, Eve has become the scapegoat for the fall of humanity. But if we slow down, read the story carefully, and look through the lens of spiritual responsibility, a much different—and far more convicting—picture begins to emerge. One that doesn't let Adam off the hook… and one that calls men today to something far greater than passive blame.
This isn’t about pointing fingers. It’s about reclaiming responsibility. And it’s long overdue.
Our springboard for today’s discussion is: “But the Lord God called to the man and said to him, ‘Where are you?’” —Genesis 3:9 (ESV)
When the serpent approached Eve in the garden, we often assume Adam was off somewhere else, unaware of what was happening. But Genesis 3:6 says, “She also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate.”
Who was with her.
That short phrase changes everything.
Adam wasn’t absent. He was right there. And he said nothing. He did nothing. He simply watched as Eve was deceived, and when offered the fruit, he took it without hesitation.
Let that sink in: the man who was given the authority to “work it and keep it” (Genesis 2:15)—to guard and protect the garden—stood by while the enemy sowed lies into his wife’s ears. He didn’t speak truth. He didn’t intervene. He didn’t protect. He was silent.
And that, my brothers, was the beginning of the fall.
Men Were Always Meant to Lead
Leadership in marriage and family doesn’t mean domination or control. It means taking responsibility. It means stepping forward with courage, love, wisdom, and spiritual clarity. Adam had been given a divine assignment: to guard what was entrusted to him and lead with God’s Word as his guide.
But in this moment of crisis, he didn’t lead—he followed.
He let the enemy speak. He let confusion set in. He let Eve carry the weight of spiritual discernment alone.
When Adam ate the fruit, it wasn’t just an act of rebellion—it was a failure of leadership. And that failure echoes into our marriages and homes today.
The Curse of Male Passivity
One of the greatest curses on today’s families isn’t violent men. It’s absent men. Not always physically—but spiritually, emotionally, and relationally absent.
Too many husbands stand silently while the enemy whispers lies to their wives. Too many fathers are watching the enemy distract, divide, and destroy their children while they remain passive and disengaged. Too many men are following their wives rather than lovingly leading them.
And here’s the hard truth: when men step back, women are often forced to step up. They feel the vacuum. And in the absence of godly leadership, someone has to make decisions, set boundaries, and fight battles.
That’s not what God designed.
Yes, women are strong. Yes, they’re capable. But they weren’t designed to carry the spiritual leadership of a marriage or a family alone. When they do, when they feel they must, something breaks. The enemy knows it. That’s why he went to Eve first—not because she was weaker, but because he knew the impact of upending divine order.
When the serpent slithered up to Eve (and by the way—it wasn’t slithering at the time… we’ll get to that), Adam should have stepped forward and said, “No. That’s not what God said. We will obey Him.” But he didn’t.
And from that moment on, humanity has paid the price for passive manhood.
Women Leading by Default
Let’s be clear: women are not the enemy. But a reversal of roles creates chaos.
We’re living in a time when culture applauds role reversals. Women are told to rise above, take charge, lead their households, and even lead their men. Men are told to submit, be silent, and follow. This isn’t about equality—this is about design.
When women force leadership—or when they feel they must because men won’t—the family begins to bend under pressure. Not because she’s incapable, but because God didn’t design her to carry that alone.
The fall didn’t start with Eve taking a bite. It started with Adam failing to lead.
Let’s Talk About That Serpent
Genesis 3 doesn’t describe a snake. The word used in Hebrew—“nachash”—refers to a shining, upright being. In fact, when the curse is pronounced, God says to the serpent, “Because you have done this, cursed are you… on your belly you shall go” (Genesis 3:14). That means before this, it wasn’t crawling. It had legs. It walked. Possibly talked.
Which raises another point: Adam and Eve didn’t seem shocked that it spoke.
That tells us something profound. In that pre-fall world, spiritual beings may have had access to man and woman in ways we can’t fully grasp now. The world was spiritually rich, multidimensional. Eve didn’t recoil. She listened. Engaged. The serpent’s voice wasn’t foreign.
But again—Adam. Was. Right. There.
And said nothing.
What If Adam Had Led?
Imagine if Adam had stepped in and said:
“No, Eve. That’s not what God said. We won’t doubt His Word. We’ll trust Him.”
The story would have ended very differently. Not because Eve was incapable, but because Adam had been assigned that leadership. And instead of leading, he watched. Then he blamed.
“The woman YOU gave me…”
He blamed Eve. He blamed God. And men have been blaming others ever since.
Time to Step Up, Not Step Back
This isn’t about shame. It’s about calling. It’s about purpose. It’s about men reclaiming their rightful place as servant-leaders in the home, in marriage, and in society.
Men—your wife needs your leadership. Your kids need your voice. Your church needs your courage. This world needs your resolve.
And not just bold words—but godly action.
Don’t be Adam in the garden—silent, watching, passive, then blaming.
Be the man who walks with God in the cool of the day. Be the man who defends truth. Be the man who leads with love and conviction.
Question of the Day:
Where in your life have you been silent when God called you to lead?
Let’s Pray:
Father, awaken in us the spirit of godly leadership. Forgive us for being silent when we should have spoken, passive when we should have led. Empower us to love deeply, lead humbly, and guard boldly. May we never again stand idle while the enemy speaks lies into our homes. Raise up a generation of men who will walk in courage, truth, and obedience. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Let’s Get To Work!
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I wrote a piece similar to this a few months ago. You touch on points I missed. Thank you for confirming what I wrote.
https://open.substack.com/pub/cecilagrantjr/p/the-genesis-of-media-manipulation?r=1etjhb&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=false